How Can I Stop My Ex From Turning My Children Against Me?

 Posted on November 23, 2025 in Child Custody

There are few things more devastating than feeling like your relationship with your children is strained. When the person responsible for the strain is your co-parent who shares custody, the situation is especially frustrating. This behavior, often called parental alienation, is damaging to your children as well. With help from knowledgeable Joliet, IL child custody lawyers, you can protect your parental rights and take steps to rebuild trust with your children.

Does Illinois Law Recognize Parental Alienation?

Parental alienation happens when one parent tries to manipulate a child into rejecting or distrusting the other parent. They might block communication or sow seeds with false claims. Even though the term "parental alienation" does not appear directly in Illinois law, the behavior behind it is recognized by the courts.

Under 750 ILCS 5/602.5 and 602.7, judges must base decisions about parenting time and decision-making on the child’s best interests. If a parent acts in a way that harms the relationship between the child and the other parent, the court can see that as emotional abuse. Judges may modify parenting time or decision-making responsibilities to stop the harmful behavior and protect the child.

How Can I Prove That My Ex Is Turning the Kids Against Me?

Proving alienation takes careful documentation and evidence. You must show that your former partner’s actions are intentional and harmful, not just the result of normal family tension. The court needs to see a pattern of manipulation or interference. Examples of strong evidence include:

• Text messages, emails, or voicemails where your ex makes negative or false statements about you to the child

• Social media posts that insult you, encourage the child to avoid you, or expose private family matters

• Witness statements from teachers, coaches, therapists, or relatives who notice that your child’s attitude has changed

• Therapy or school records showing emotional distress linked to one parent’s comments or pressure

• Screenshots or call logs proving your messages or calls to your child are being blocked or ignored

• Parenting time logs that show repeated cancellations, last-minute changes, or refusal to follow the court-ordered schedule

• Recordings or written notes of incidents where your child repeats adult language or false stories about you

Both parents have a right to reasonable parenting time unless doing so would seriously endanger the child’s health or safety. When one parent prevents or manipulates that time, it violates both the law and the child’s best interests. Keeping detailed records allows your attorney to show the court that alienation is happening and that your child’s emotional health is at risk.

What Can I Do Right Now To Protect My Relationship With My Child?

Even while your case is ongoing, there are ways to protect your bond with your child. Focus on staying positive. Respond with patience instead of anger when your child repeats hurtful comments. Continue showing up for your scheduled parenting time and keep communication open, even if it feels one-sided.

Do not speak negatively about your ex in front of your child, no matter how upsetting the situation becomes. Instead, remind your child that both parents love them and that none of this is their fault. Staying consistent and kind helps rebuild trust. If possible, work with a counselor who understands family conflicts and can guide you through these challenges.

Contact an Orland Park, IL Parental Responsibilities Attorney Today

At The Foray Hurst Firm, we are passionate about "Preserving The Dignity of Families In Transition." We are proud members of the Black Women Lawyers’ Association, the Black Bar Association of Will County, the Cook County Bar Association, and the National Bar Association. Our dedication has always been to advocacy, integrity, and justice. We understand the pain of parental alienation and will fight to protect your relationship with your children.

Contact us at 312-702-1293 today and schedule a consultation with one of our Joliet, IL child custody lawyers who care.